Pack w/LYRICS Released!

[Trip]

After some time now, I'm finally releasing the lyrics to my Wal-Mart rap songs! Check it out!! =D

A whopping 200 views on YouTube! Thanks to all who listened! ^_^

WAL-MART RAP PACK: www.youtube.com/watch?v=dHmitUlx7GE


Lyrics Below!!

[Trip]

Wal-Mart Shopping
Written by Ronald Adams aka Trip/TripMX


Say yo, it's time to go to Wal-Mart for some shoppin'
I get right in, I see an Associate stockin'
Tryin' his best to fulfill the workload with a box in his hand that needs to be sold

So I take a walk down isle number nine 
And notice that the shelves smell like lemon-lime
Then I say to myself "OH I need some Pine-Sol"
So I turn back around and see a bag of draws

For the low low price of just six ninety-nine
I open up my wallet disappointed to find
Just a dime, a dime wrapped in cabbage ya hear
A long term tradition from my dearest Madear

It's for fortune, for luck, for money and such
But I'm always broke, I never shop for much
So I look again and find my debit card
And think "Pine-Sol yeah that's what I'm searching for!"

I say forget the draws, let's go to the wall
With luxurious cleaners like Clorox and Pine-Sol
Oh ooh yeah smelled so great
But when I looked at the price, my jaw cracked the plate

Damn! What's up with all these high ass prices?!
Is this really Wal-Mart, or just low price sacrifices
I can get the same shit from the store on the corner
'Cause they lower their price, mind you, don't you even wanna!? 

Hmph! Looks like Electronics is next
Let's hope that the offers match the printed text
Hey! I got this sales ad that shows that the TV's resolution's bad
There's no "p", you know, like 720p
High Definition is what appeals to me

I'm just checkin', 'cause that price is pretty cheap
But for a Wal-Mart product, I'm surprised it ain't steep
So lemme make my way, out of here
Because now I have a craving for a nice cold beer

So I grab a Miller, Light that is
And prepare my tongue for a stinging fizz
Bright and ready to check it out
See the lines curvin' long like a roundabout

I thought to myself "Why only three registers open?" 
With cashiers moving like they been on some heavy dopin'
Taking their precious time to scan a single item
When they should be fast, like when they steal quarters and hide 'em

Ahh! Finally it's my turn to check out my beer
And by now my patience is a thing to fear
You better not make an mistakes, you sluggish cashier
For it's your life on the line, not your job ya hear?

As nervous as she was, she had no problem
So I took my bag with receipt and didn't have to rob 'em
Now the door greeter stoppin' me, interruptin' the pace
So I threw him the receipt and drank a beer in his face

DEUCE!!

[Trip]

Service Desk
Written by Ronald Adams aka Trip/TripMX


Hey I'm Lucille, I work customer service desk
And there's quite a few things I have to confess
I stand here blatantly fulfilling requests
For a bunch of people who call themselves guests

Sure it's my job and obligation to help them out
But the stuff they bring back just makes me wanna shout
How you gonna return a half-eaten cake
Girl, you know better, go feed your snake

I deal with meanies and grumps alike
Even people who drunk, and whose drinks got spiked
They come to me like they own the bitch
But little do they know, I was whipped with a switch!

Sure I got my ass beat as a kid
But I know I learned my lesson unlike this shit
Wal-Mart's rule of thumb is to keep the receipt
But when you try to return a piece of gum, GET AWAY FROM ME!

It's just twenty-five cents, don't be wasting my time
I can't understand how ya'll people just think it's fine
You may as well return a Valentine's card
'Cause look at you returning dumb shit didn't make your boyfriend hard

[Customer] Ma'am I'd like to return this item, it's broken
[Lucille] Do you have a receipt 'cause you know it's the token
[Customer] C'mon man, I just bought this shit
[Lucille] I'm not a man I'm a woman, no, get get get!

My oh my they bring back just anything
I know it's my job, but JEEZ don'tcha think!
Sure it's part of the cheesy Wal-Mart policy
And the current CEOs probably warped the whole family tree

[Customer] Umm, this lipstick I bought made my lips swell
[Lucille] Mmhmm, yeah you got your receipt, girl?
[Customer] Yes, here it is, take a look for yourself!
[Lucille] Girl, that's for shoes, put that lipstick back on the shelf!

They always think that they better than you
And swear on everything they'd start a lawsuit
Little do they know, I got other things to do
I don't have time to stand there just listening to you

Now it's time for my lunch break; don't be stoppin' me
But it never fails, it's like they know telepathy
[Customer] Ma'am can you you help me, I have a return
[Lucille] No, my food's in the microwave, I ain't lettin' it burn!

Byyyyyyyeeeeeee~~~

[Trip]

Wal-Mart Management
Written by Ronald Adams aka Trip/TripMX



Uuuuunnh, I'm a manager at Wal-Mart yeahhh
I welcome the customers in heeeere
Take a basket drop, shop, that's how we rock
The founder's Sam Walton, not Chrono Trigger Dalton

Why don'tcha take a basket and say hello to Carlton
Got him working hard right under my shoulders
He works so slow, you swear he's liftin' a boulder

I'm a manager, I train not to give a duck
If you want a duck, you go to Sporting Goods to get that stuff
Uuuuuunh yeah yeah, Uuuuuunh Wal-Mart yeah

Now it's time for me to do my daily walk
To see what my associates are doing on the clock
I have a big fat beer gut anyway
So it's pretty routine for me to check on my slaves

Uuuuuunh yeah yeah yeah, Uuuuuunh Wal-Mart yeah
What I do is look for fights to pick, to ensure paycheck just stays thick
I don't care if they like me or not 
This is my job, all I'm doin' is tryin' to keep my damn spoooot
Yeah yeah ha, yeah Wal-Mart yeah!

Hey Lucy, why don't you pick up that box
Put your badge on, don't act like you off the clock
Don't you even look at me, 'cause I don't give a fock
Yeah FOCK, the one that rhymes with SOCK!

[Chorus] Oh why are we so kind thee, Sam Walton's kind words were destroyed by the management teaaaaam!!

Don't even front, you lowlife associate
Watch your tongue, 'cause it's a coaching you'll get
You should very well should know that we are against unions
So you better watch out next time Wal-Mart family reunion

I got the power to employ and unemploy
So you get your head straight before I send you to Toys
'Cause it's zone zone zone, that place is a mess
'Purgatory' some say, outside of the management nest

Don't forget about our open-door policy
Whether you're afraid or not, it's like a Wally Space Odyssey
You can try your very best to get me fired
But it ruins your chances to be re-hired

[Customer] Hello sir, I'm looking for a little somethin' for my wife at home; she's my country bumpkin, I know it's Halloween and I should be gettin' a pumpkin because also at home uh, we have a little munchkin

Uhhh, sorry sir, I have no idea what you're talking about
But I can direct you to an associate who's short and stout...?

[Customer] Ummm! Like excuse me! Aren't you supposed to be a manager?
You helped that customer like he was a ham sandwicher
Yeah sure, I made it up slick
But that's no excuse to be a dick!

I'm terribly sorry for the inconvenience ma'am
Should I escort you back to your Grand Am?
Yes I know your vehicle, I'm with Loss Prevention
So you'd never know if following you home was my intention

[Customer] Oh my god! That's the last straw
When Home Office finds out, they'll do you raw
Consider this complaint, your last one
'Cause when I finish with you, your regret will weigh a ton~!

Ohh shoot, I'm done!
Nooooooooo~ I'm done, done yeah
I'm done, done yeah
Turn my badge in, turn my nice clothes in
Aw yeah yeah yeah~